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CFM Babs from Chorley FM


No Techno!

Posted by CFMBabs , 20 June 2008 · 596 views

Me and computers -- Bah humbug! I never got the hang of jargon or any kind of speed on the keyboard and it showed up rather brilliantly yesterday when trying to access the sclero chat room. Once I'd managed to tap every X in every window I finally came upon the right box and I was in! first problem over then!

I was greeted by loads of Hi's and my little fingers began hitting the keys in pure excitement. It wasn't that easy for me to keep up and before I'd managed to reply to any questions, they'd gone up the page and my reply made no sense at all.

My daughter hung over my shoulder shouting "Quick! - answer that one with just a yep or nope." My daughter is master of text messaging and her advice made no sense at all. At one point she was tapping the keys with an impatient manner over my shoulders much to my annoyance, little did I know she was trying to hurry me along so she could use the computer for her own little chat schedule. The result was a lighthearted argument of which I backed down and gave her the laptop.

Teenagers, eh! I feel like a grandmother rather than her mum and I'm sure that's how she sees me sometimes. I do sort of feel ancient at times especially when it comes to technology. Give me a recipe book and I can literally cook anything. Give me a computer task and the term fish out of water comes to mind. And the music! Try and download anything and I'm lost, although I have to admit my daughter does like the old stuff, actually in her eyes 80's music is old, in mine it's just classic!

I don't understand all the different styles of music, if you have teenagers I'm sure you will know what I mean? Some of it I quite like, some I definitely dislike like rap! It seems so angry and like a naughty school kid having a spat with an overprotective parent. Perhaps that's the gist of it, no wonder the world is upside down.

I must live a very simple life, dissolutioned perhaps. I have to accept that the world goes on around me and not I around it! I suppose if things had not moved on, we'd be steam propelled and still singing around the piano instead of worrying about petrol, oil, and the rubbish on TV. Actually it's not a bad thought, singing around the piano and running on steam -- two problems sorted in one, the family structure reinstated and a solution to global warming!

Only problem there is we haven't got a piano and even if we did, we can neither play it or sing! Back to the drawing board then!

Technology, not such a humbug after all!


Let Them Stare!

Posted by CFMBabs , 18 June 2008 · 599 views

Just when you thought it was safe! Why am I not surprised that we've had a few days of sun and now we have torrential downpours? It's always the same; this country just stinks when it comes to weather. It's common for us to discuss the weather as a form of common courtesy, no wonder when we depend so much upon it.

The chickens look bedraggled like they've been hosed down with a pipe full of mud. The geese are no longer white but orange since they've been sitting in the sand much to our annoyance, there's nothing worse than goose doo doo in the cement! There's a river running through the yard and the weeds hang their head in shame but keep on growing nonetheless!

All I can do is gaze out of the window hoping that tomorrow will bring a brighter picture. We have so much to do and so little time. A hole in my gable is not good when we are due to leave the country. We managed to build the internal wall half way up and then wouldn't you know it? The sky opened and down came the rain and hasn't stopped since.

It just makes the need to leave these shores ever more desirable. Just think a whole week in the warmth of the sun without fear of taking off my clothes for fear of hypothermia. I can wallow in the rays without a shiver, or dare I say a raynaud's attack for the best part of the afternoon. I can do a great impression of a basking lizard without breaking sweat and if I get into the pool I usually get a rousing applause!

When I think back to the day's when I had more meat on my bones, it always brings a smile to my face. I should feel a sense of embarrasment when on one occasion I got stuck in a huge rubber ring on the lazy river in Rhodes. It took a number of folk just to get me out and when they did, I hit the water and sank. After that I avoided any kind of water based experiences which was fully justified when my daughter hollored across the hotel complex.

"Get in the pool mum -- we'll get you out!

I think the entire British, German, Swiss, French or Greek contingent raised their heads from their sun loungers and focused upon me who by this time was trying to hide beneath a towel. The whole experience beside the pool that day was one to be avoided.

Of course my life has changed since then. I will gladly dip my toes in the pool and when brave enough, do a couple of strokes in the shallow end avoiding the part where the floor drops away along with my confidence. People stare for different reasons now, namely my abdominal tube which sticks out like a beach ball valve. I overcame my embarassment a couple of years ago and now my assumption is -- let them stare!

It all seems a world away as I watch the rain pour from my seat beside the window. I put on another log to a fire that's dying and a room that's cooling. The TV is on in the corner, some weird TV film fitting for a wet afternoon and with that I switch off. Back to washing dishes, the leftover chore from lunch. May as well do something other than watch my fire go out and the rain come in!


Weird Thoughts!

Posted by CFMBabs , 16 June 2008 · 568 views

Men and their playthings! My daft hubby bought a toy which exterminates flies -- true! It's a new fangled thing that electrocutes with one foul swoop! It looks like a tennis raquet but the strings are made of wire. My hubby spent most of the weekend whacking the blighters nearly demolishing all the china and almost hitting himself upon the head at one point. My daughter did the proper job of doing just that when an unsuspecting fly landed upon his bonce whilst he dozed in front of the TV. He leapt up in the air with a scream because although she missed hitting the fly, the electric shock zapped my hubby with a crack and by all accounts it was hilarious.

We giggled for hours afterwards and my hubby scowled. The racquet was left in the corner of the room after that -- reprieve for the flies or was it for my husband?

A pretty wasteful weekend really. The weather wasn't as bad as anticipated and it would have been an ideal opportunity to carry on with building, however it wasn't to be and now my hubby is sick with a tummy bug. To say he'd been in the wars this weekend is no understatement!

The whole country is going petrol mad. Filling stations closing due to depleted stocks. I queued half an hour at the filling station because I was desperate for fuel and then did exactly the same as everyone else and filled up my tank. I thought it was a good idea to get it whilst I still could; living out in the country is difficult enough without running out of fuel. It was only a matter of time before someone did just that and it happened right outside my gate so I could neither get in or out!

Two guys rubbing their heads wondering what to do didn't help my cause. They'd run out of diesel on the way home passing several filling stations which had all closed their pumps. My drive was the safest point to stop, just off the main road. I wasn't happy but in the end I realised that it wasn't their fault just the fault of many who have been panic buying, including myself!

It's difficult to see where all this will end. Surely there is a contingency plan for when the oil finally runs out? If they refined methane, I would have no problem, I have enough of the stuff that produces it lying around the yard. I often wondered if they could use magnetism for propelling a vehicle and then my hubby laughed at me -- everything metal would stick to the car. Then I imagined a scene of carnage as every metalic object flew through the air and stuck to my vehicle and I around a lamp post! I have a wierd imagination as you can probably tell?

We'll probaby end up like the Flintstones in our bottomless vehicles and leg power. There I go again off in a tangent. "Yabba Dabba Dooo!" I say.


A Really Happy Birthday!

Posted by CFMBabs , 14 June 2008 · 583 views

Seeing my friend's face as she walked through the door of the restaurant was a picture worthy of pride of place. It was her birthday and she knew nothing of the surprise that awaited her arrival. Twelve of her closest friends all stood, raised their glasses and sung Happy Birthday. She stood motionless with a dropped jaw and tearful eyes -- this is my best friend, my closest pal, my adopted sister.

After the intial shock, she sat shaking with emotion as everyone gave her presents and cards. There were numerous alcoholic beverages in front of her, so many that if I'd have drunk half of them I'd have been comatose! Friends she hadn't seen for years and friends who had only spoke to her a couple of hours previous all laughed and talked like it was an old school reunion and the atmosphere was electric.

Her 91 year old Aunt and her 87 year old friend, had never been to an Indian Restaurant, in fact they'd never been to a foreign restaurant before in their life and it was a totaly new experience for them. The menu was rather confusing, they couldn't pronounce half of it and didn't have a clue about the cuisine. They had plenty of help of course but the spicy dishes and the garlic smell didn't whip up much of an appetite with them and they casually asked for chips! Chips (or French fries) with a nice steak definately wasn't on the menu, so they settled for poppadums and chutney for starters and something mild for the main course.

The wine and the beer was flowing. I just sat with a soft fizzy drink and decided to share the meal my husband ordered. I can't eat really but I can have a taste as long as I don't have to chew anything. I'm kind of okay with a little rice and a bit of sauce but after that, that's about it! I knew that I'd be awake for most of the night, but this was my friend's birthday and it gives her great pleasure to see me joining in with the meal.

"These poppawatsits are really nice they're like a big crisp," piped up Auntie Betty.

"I like that magno chutney," said her friend!

Everone erupted with laughter. "Well you've just had your first Indian meal at 91 and it's mango chutney," said my friend.

The night went really well. My friend was in tears for most of the evening but they were tears of joy. "I'll never forget my 59th birthday!" she said.

It gave me great pleasure and satisfaction knowing that I gave her the best present ever. I haven't been able to do much in the last 3 years and somehow always gave her a paltry treat. Most likely it was a CD or a bunch of flowers and I always felt I could have done more because she's worth so much more than that! How do you top that next year? She's 60 next time and that in itself is a celebration worth a fuss. I guess we'll think of something.


Taking Flight

Posted by CFMBabs , 12 June 2008 · 585 views

I need to get away! That may sound like a plea for help but actually it's for solace and a bit of warmth. The weather is freezing, not literally but you get the gist, I'm sure! I've lit a huge fire and can't seem to pull myself away from it.

In the car I have numerous requests to turn the heating off, my dad for instance, can't stand the heat, my hubby cannot tolerate warmth at all and then there's me freezing! If I put the car heater on, the windows are instantly wound down and then I get a blast of wind pinning me back into my seat -- I really can't win!

There will be moans when he comes home from work. "A fire," he will say. "...in June? -- you're having a laugh!" I wish it was something to laugh about and I wonder how he would feel to be permanently cold as opposed to hot all of the time. Of course it's not just a matter of feeling cold, it's the pain that comes with it! The severity of raynaud's attacks varies throughout the day and some days it's much worse than others. You simply can't concentrate on anything or do anything constructive when your fingers go numb, it's like my brain follows suit and that goes numb as well!

I wish the summer here would start. We've had a glimpse of it last week but so far it's not happening. I'll be so glad to step off the plane in Greece but if the temperature there falls below 80 degrees I'll be back to my white, blue, and red. Oh I'm not being patriotic, although my fingers do emulate the 3 colours of the British flag!

I'm packing my last few items and amongst all the skimpy tops and shorts is my cardigan and a few pairs of socks. "You may as well pack some gloves as well" My hubby said! Well I may not go quite that far but it's an idea.

It's my friend's birthday today and we're doing something rather special. Whether she will thank us after the event or not remains to be seen. She's 59 and really down in the dumps. My hubby and I decided to do something a little different for her this year -- I guess you've realised just how special she is to us!

She unwittingly thinks that there's just myself, Steve and Steph going out to the local Indian restaurant for an ordinary meal. We thought it would be a good idea not to tell her that we've invited all of her friends, even her old Aunt of 91 who hates anything spicy, so this should be good.

I bought her a birthday cake from the supermarket, I didn't have the Ooomph! to do it myself. I've just iced her name upon it and that's about as much as I could do in my present frame of mind. She thinks that everyone has forgotton -- poor thing! I hope the evening goes well so she can find it in her heart to forgive me for being so cruel.

Time for a hot drink, I think.


Happy Radio, Happy Faces.

Posted by CFMBabs , 11 June 2008 · 581 views

I'm sat here pondering -- I have a show to do tomorrow and I haven't a clue what I'm doing. My recipe selection for my Dish Of The Week spot is not forthcoming. I've not been able to come up with any ideas since I've had so much to do this week.

A funny moment yesterday when I went to the local residential care home for a meeting. I'd bought some facial moisturiser, a little pampering for my skin. It said: Combat the signs of ageing, wipe away those wrinkles. Well I don't have many on account of sclero but the ones I do have might as well have some TLC. I bought it from a local bargain bucket less then half the price of the cheapest cream I've ever seen. "Can't be much use" I thought! But I'll give it a try none-the-less. I stroked it on my face as directed -- it felt greasy but it soon blended into my thirsty skin. I looked for instant results as stated, but much to my disappointment, I looked no different. My hubby smirked and commented that I'd need a couple of jars, perhaps the whole crate to make a difference to my fizzhog!

We were getting ready to go to my Aunt's care home for a meeting. I know most of the residents but it's still my least favourite task because it's so boring sitting in a room full of dignitaries blowing their own trumpets about budgets and improvements that never really seem to make any difference. We sat in the corner with my Aunt and another lady. I caught her glancing at me several times without saying anything and when the introductions were over, we all recieved an outline plan of the new proposals for the year. It was then that the lady turned to me and said, "You look different -- what have you done to your face?"

Wow! I thought that stuff really is good. "Do I look younger?" I asked.

"No," was the reply, "...blotchy"

I looked at my hubby and he agreed that I did have some spots. Well I suppose it does work because it took me back to my teens with acne.

I couldn't wait to get home and wash my face. That's what I love about the senior generation -- they're so honest! They come straight out with it! Like kids really! If you want an honest opinion ask your gran or your kids. Your hubby can be unpredictable depending on which side of the fence he's sitting, and if he's in the dog house, forget a truthful opinion about how you look because you'll look a million dollars in your worst outfit and bad hair day!

I'll survive the wrinkles -- forget the botox and I'll just be me!


Mum By The Wayside!

Posted by CFMBabs , 08 June 2008 · 589 views

I guess it shows that I don't have much to occupy myself during the day. Serena! you so rightly pointed out that my blog writing is prolific these days almost like I'm competing for the world record and that just about sums up my day! A busy mum simply does not have time to herself and that is why I seem to have so much free time these days to do whatever I please. My daughter is well on her way to the outside world, I just provided the guidance to get her there! What I'm left with now is a huge gap in my parental nature, no job and not much else to care for except the geese, goats and chickens, but of course they don't come with the sort of responsibilty you need when parenting.

I still get the odd cuddle or two but it usually precedes a favour like, can you wash my jeans, can you loan me some money, will you make an appointment with the hairstylist, Y'know those sort of favours! Once we could have a conversation consisting of a thousand words after school -- now it's a grunt or a D'Know!

I'd swap anyone for another chance of re-living the early days when she was a sweet little girl holding mum's hand and skipping in the street. Would I have done things any differently? I don't think so! On the whole she's good kid, everyone tells me so, so I can't have done such a bad job after all.

So, Serena. Writing blogs is one thing but you have something far more special and that is your boys. They have a talented, hard working mum who will give them the best start in life possible. I may write on a daily basis but you my friend are doing a much greater job! Your book may be slender but you are writing a whole new chapter in life every day and those are memories you'll treasure for the rest of your life.

Time is precious they say!


The Sun Has Its Hat On!

Posted by CFMBabs , 08 June 2008 · 586 views

"The Sun Has Got it's Hat On - Hip, Hip, Hip Hooray!" I break into song. Us Brits do get excited at the prospect of sunny days. Everyone seems much happier, more pleasent and we even smile!

It's true we are ruled by the weather and it's no wonder really! 365 days of what seemed like an endless winter last year - we had no seasons. Your dare to think what the next few weeks will have in store for us so make the most of today!

We went shopping yesterday afternoon. I cheered myself up with a new pair of 3/4 length pants. My suitcase is full to bursting now! My daughter had an arm full of clothes, she'll need an elephant and sherpa to carry it to the airplane -- we're only going for one week! My hubby shakes his head in disbelief, but then he has nothing to moan about, his case is full as well and a gentle reminder shut's him up. Huh--men!

Well we left the shop with hubby looking like the proverbial donkey, he could hardly see where he was going! 5 bags and car keys in his mouth. His penance for being so miserable. I guess it must have been one of those days because just looking around the street we saw other guys carrying shopping too, aknowledging the fact as they passed by. It was quite a scene! The look on some of their faces was a yearning to be in the pub rather than with the missus, but Saturday is ladies' day and shopping delight!

Before you begin to feel sorry for him -- fair is fair! I help to build, and do as much work as he does on the house. Sure I can't lift the heavy blocks but I can lay bricks and help to lay the floor, my icing skills came in to great use! I helped take down the wall which took all of 7 weeks and cleaned all the bricks one by one. Never mind that I had numb fingers throughout and had immeasurable pain, which I won't mention for sympathy. I run on very economical fuel and I'm very cheap labour indeed! I'm not blowing my own trumpet here but on the whole I think I do quite well considering.

There's a small carnival in the village today, one where my daughter will be taking the Brownies to join the procession. She's a young leader -- Barn Owl is her position. 17 little mites walking down the lane along with a brass band, bagpipes and the boys brigade with their bugles. I've stood and watched every year but this one. "Mum don't watch me this year, I'm embarrassed enough!"

I think my time as a proud onlooker is over and I've been relagated to the ranks of a drop off mum rather than a photograph taking "That's my girl" with pointed finger and overwhelming pride. I guess my time for that is over, although I'm still proud of her from a distance. I'll just stay home an wait for the phone call when she's all finished and knowing Steph like I do, it won't be long.

Better get dressed into something more becoming of a Barn Owl's mum. I'm still in pyjamas. The next problem is what to wear? it looks lovely outdoors but is it? I dare not wear anything without sleeves for fear of freezing. What ever happened to flaming June?

We congregated at the local car park. All manner of folk were there, banners, bands and costumes so bright I needed sunglasses. "I'm so excited!" screamed one woman in a huge hat and an outfit fit for the Queen's coronation.

My daughter turned to me and said rather sarcasticaly, "I can hardly contain myself." Her face an absolute picture making no effort to show the slightest interest and when the brass band showed up she moaned "Oh no -- my call."

Time for me to make a sharp exit allowing Steph to gather all the little excited Brownies. I left her in the middle of a pack who were all squabbling about who got to hold the flag.

Back home and thankful that she actually went, because there were some doubts beforehand, I await her call. I can hear the band in the distance, the breeze is blowing right this way. Slightly out of tune but the drum beat is loud enough to quieten the geese.

There'a a village fete afterwards, one were I do my bit for tradition. They were setting stalls just before I left and no doubt I'll be coming home with home made jam, scones and perhaps a goldfish, but I hope not. I've been there and done that in years past when Steph was just a mere snippet. Trying my hand at something silly just for fun and winning a live fish to take home, much to the delight of my daughter who'd already named the thing. I'd be left with the dilemma of a home for 'Freddie the fish" and often resorted to my best deep glass dish as a temporary measure. By the time Monday came round, the thing had usually died, probably of shock, old age or some child prodding intervention. And then there were tears! That's how we got into keeping tropical fish because of a very upsetting weekend due to a goldfish. The only thing which would console my daughter was to purchase a fish tank and fill it with all manner of bright little fishes. We had that tank for years until we moved home and then we gave it away.

Better stick to the hamburger stall I think! I may win something on the tombola or in a raffle which I'll buy solely for charity, either way it's just for fun!


Senior Moments

Posted by CFMBabs , 07 June 2008 · 754 views

A solitary warble fom a bird not too far from my window. I rolled over in my bed and glaced at the clock -- 3.10 am! I remember thinking, I wish that bird would shut up, at this rate it would wake all the others like a roll call. I could see the geese fom my window as by then I'd got up to see which bird was making all the racket. Their heads were tucked inside their wings and they olnly made an occasional honk. I looked around a very quiet landscape and pictured the whole world sleeping.

Not one but several birds were now twittering and then my hubby piped up "What are you doing -- what time is it?"

I'm sure he thinks I'm losing it. I do have senior moments now and then. I say stupid things and put things down where I can't remember. I can walk from one room to another forgetting why I was going in there in the first place. I blame the menopause but I also worry it may be something more, something my hubby keeps reminding me of. My mother died last year with dementia, she was 81. At times I can see myself in her and it get's a little frightening.

I have enough problems to be going on with -- who knows what the future holds? I very much live for the here and now and that's my policy on life.

3 more weeks and I'll be on my Greek island. I shan't have a care in the world then, other than when to put on the sunscreen. I still have a great hole in my wall but, hey! why worry? My diary is full of dates marked for appointments, I'll be in a tizzy for sure. I have 3 cases to pack and a mountain of ironing. "I'm not taking much" my hubby announced! The truth is he has more than us right now and us girls can't allow that. A serious shopping trip is planned next week which will see me with more packing and perhaps we're heading for a weight levy at the airport checkout desk! They allow much less these days on account of rising fuel costs. I can only get 30 miles in my car at the moment, it's almost £6.00 a gallon!

Saturday morning, there's just myself downstairs. Hubby is at work and daughter still in slumber. I shan't wake her. It looks pretty grim outside and the weather forecast isn't good! No building work today and another day lost. Maybe we'll get a little done this evening. Who knows!


The Dentist Chair

Posted by CFMBabs , 06 June 2008 · 637 views

Sat nervously in the dentist's chair
Wishing that I wasn't there
Too many sweets can spoil your smile
Let me just reiterate a while
It wasn't sweets that caused decay
Although I know what you're going to say!

A proper meal I cannot eat
Please don't deny me the odd sweet
I haven't had very much luck
When all I can have is a sweet to suck
I know that they are very bad
I have no choice and that is sad

My teeth were once a pearly white
And many envied my perfect bite
I brushed them daily, took such pride
But now I only try and hide
They've lost their shine and it's unfair
That scleroderma played it's share

In goes the numbing syringe
Ouch! that hurts, I cringe
Wait a moment for it to feeze
I'll be back in a moment, please!
I'm feeling numb and I hear the whirrr!
The dentist's drill beside the chair

Nearly finished I sigh relief
I wish I'd looked after my teeth
I don't want dentures, that isn't good
I'd like to keep them if I could
A crocodile smile I have no more
And I walk numbly out the door

I've been to the demphist, I surbibed the day
And now I'm froben and on my way
I'll get right home and have a cup of coppee
And I'll keep away from sweets and toppee

I'm spill proben and it's half past pour

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