It Never Rains But It Pours!
"I haven't got my car today and my hubby works inside the prison -- he's got the car and doesn't come home till after 5pm."
"Oh ****!" said my dietician. "I'll come for you"
I stuttered "B..but my hubby won't know where I am?"
"Then that's a problem then isn't it! Let me think."
I imediately began to put a plan into action and came up with a compromise. "I'll ring the GI speciaist nurse," knowing full well that she goes home at 4 pm. My plan worked but at a cost. She told me that she had a super dooper new turbo tube for me -- the latest model! "This one is more discreet and less trouble" she said!"
I'm booked in for a small surgical procedure on 12th June, hence it never rains but pours! So what is this new fangled piece of equipment? All I know is it's supposed to look like a valve on a beach ball and it's placed in the small bowel protruding out of my abdomen. Now! what do you make of that? What will happen if I accidently pull the cap off -- do I deflate like a balloon and fly around the room making flatulent noises -- or do I shrivel up like a prune? I'm not keen on this idea at all.
Still, I'll look much better in a swimsuit! Last year I had to hide it in a pouch which kept coming off in the pool and my tube floated to the surface like a submarine. Good job I didn't go in the sea or I may have caught some unsuspecting fish. Greece looks a better prospect next month! Yes! we're planning a trip some time soon and me with my new modern state of the art tube -- a new me. I can hardly wait. There's just the small matter of having it done, of course, and, well, let's just say I haven't been too lucky with hospital stays in the past! What started out as just a few days, turned into months and then a year. I'm not going to think about it and I'll just take it as it comes.
I think it's turning into a storm!