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December Holidays

Posted by CFMBabs , 31 October 2006 · 823 views

December will be upon us and the festivities begin
The stores are full of glitter, every one you go in
I'm thinking about the turkey, I'll need a whopper this year
Coz, I've got the family coming, it's my turn here
I remember about the last time, what a disaster it turned out to be
Auntie Mary drunk as a lord and knocking over the tree
Then there was the pudding my mother took care of that
But left it on the stove too long, and in the front room sat
The kitchen was full of acrid smoke the pudding was on fire
And I was running up and down, the situation dire

Uncle John was red in face, jolly and quite merry
He's drunk a bottle of cheap red wine and now he's at the sherry
Singing songs from way back when, the party's in full swing
Whoever in their right minds told Auntie Mary to sing
The cat ran under the table, the dog chased it under the tree
There was string and paper everywhere, as far as you could see
Poor puss was spitting and hissing, the dog was having fun
That tree was sure to go over before the day was done

It's three o clock and now's the time, the Queen goes on TV
And all the family settle down, this woman they want to see
My Uncle sneers in a drunken state, bet she's not having sprouts
She'll be having caviar, someone from the back shouts
She spoke about world peace and other things as well
But missed the bit in the middle coz Uncle John fell
Yeah, she'll be having a grand affair with servants to serve her dish
And served upon a silver plate with her every need and wish
And I bet she talked about the starving, and all those in toil and need
And what she'll have this afternoon will be nothing but lavish greed

The paper hats from crackers are gracing every head
And every bad joke ever thought are drunkenly being read
They're all sat round the table waiting for the feast
And I can't get the turkey out, this year it's just a beast
The legs are stuck in the oven as I push and pull the bird
And finally at the table, the loudest cheer could be heard
And what about the pudding? You thought I'd forgot about that
Well it's gone to make a special treat for a daft dog and hissing cat
The festivities now over and everyone heads for home
And finally we're quiet by ourselves and drinks alone
It wasn't such a bad day, everything went just fine
But someone can do it next year, they aint coming to mine!

That was 4 years ago
Watch this space!

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