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barefut impressions



Posted by barefut , 26 July 2008 · 895 views

My 10 year old came to me the other day, stuck his armpit up to my face and said, "Look mom! Pit hair!" It was a hair alright. But it wasn't his. Turns out he was teasing me.

We were watching a funny video show on TV where a goose was attacking people. My son's friend said, "Man, geese are mean!" to which my son replied without batting an eye, "That's how you get goosebumps."

Yes, I have a little comedian in my home. He has been a clown since he was able to walk and talk. He made a name for himself in Playschool when he was only 18 months old. Parents I didn't even know, knew my little clown and I would hear, "Oh, you're Ryan's mom..." and then, "Good luck with that." as they watched him dance on the tables.

I have hours and hours of video that would take days to watch. Some of it worthy of television video show awards. (Hmmm....I could use $10,000) I also have a little journal stashed away with all the funny things he's said and done over the years. It's priceless. So is he. :D


Soul Searching

Posted by barefut , 19 July 2008 · 837 views

The boys and I went to the beach late this afternoon with a picnic dinner and ran into our little birthday girl and her family. They are such great, fun people. Awesome parents, loving, protcective and kind. My little preschool alumni girl snuggled up to me on the driftwood log and asked me if she could sit on my lap. Oh my heart! :D

I'm not sure if I believe in coincidences or not. I'm one of those who tends to believe that almost everything happens for a reason; we just have to be paying attention. Seeing the girls reminded me of my preschool and of the in-home daycare I had planned on starting but never did. I'm wondering if recent events and seeing the girls two weekends in a row might be signs that I should reconsider the in-home daycare.

Self-employment is hard. Self-employment in childcare is even harder and self-employment in childcare, out of your own home is even harder still. Not to mention trying to get affordable health insurance coverage - and doing it all while battling scleroderma and trying to get divorced. Not looking for sympathy (this time) just thinking 'out loud' and wondering if I could really do it. I'd probably have to beef-up the Cellcept and the Prednisone :lol: .

My heart really is in childcare. Too bad my muscles, connective tissues, lungs, my entire gastrointestinal system and my stamina isn't on board too.


Summer day

Posted by barefut , 12 July 2008 · 900 views

The sweet, sweet smell of my fresh cut sweet pea flowers fills my kitchen :D (nice change from the litterbox smell :P ) It took me all day but I managed to get all the grass mowed, all my plants watered and had spoons left over for some planting, pruning and picking. The boys helped me mow the backyard and the oldest did a little weed whacking. My little men.

During the hottest part of the day we went to a Hawaiian themed birthday party for a little friend of ours who turned 7. How nice it was to sit in the shade with cold drink in hand and watch the kids play in the kiddie pool. And then to get fed too! Skewers of teriaki chicken, pineapple and red peppers hot off the grill and on a bed of rice - YUM!

I had the birthday girl's little sister in my preschool last year. It was so good to see them again. Getting to spend time around all the little ones was good for me. I can see myself nagging my grown boys for grandchildren.

Back at home around 5pm and no need to make dinner as we were so full from the party. Big one went to his buddy's house down the road for a sleepover and the little guy hung out with me while I played around in the yard until dark. Then we snuggled in the hammock with pillows and blankies and watched the stars come out.

I woke to mosquitos buzzing my face and a dampness that chilled me to the bone. I pulled my son's legs over my lap, swung my own legs over the edge and in one smooth motion rolled us both out of the hammock without waking him. Hammocks are much easier to get out of with a 50 pound, sleeping kid on your lap than a recliner! Sleeping in our nests on the couch tonight.

I am surprised by all I got done today in the yard. I paced myself very well, if I do say so myself (pat on back). I'm sure it helped that I slept in until 9am (without sleep aid) and I only worked in the shade. I'm getting the hang of it!

Now, to tackle the inside tomorrow....


Crash and Burn

Posted by barefut , 11 July 2008 · 871 views

Well I couldn't do it today. I just could not make it into work. Fatigue and exhaustion won. Haven't been sleeping much all week. Burning flank pain came back too so I saw my urologist on a moment's notice (he's a gem). No blood in urine. doctor says burning pain is nerve related. He asked what's up? I told him just more of the same - and not sleeping. He suggested a sleep aid for a limited time, so I said I'd try it. I'll start it tomorrow.

Hopefully, catching up on some good deep sleep will bring me back to life. I have felt like an absent-minded idiot. In fact, I didn't remember doctor giving me the Rx. I remember seeing him writing it but did not remember taking it from him and putting it in my purse, which is where I found it after I stupidly asked him if he gave it to me. :blink: Imagine if I had gone to work today and tried to handle other people's money! :o

Must go now - in search of REM........zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz


Crazy life

Posted by barefut , 03 July 2008 · 883 views

What a crazy past few weeks! Gone from 8am to 8pm, 5 days a week with Ryan's baseball practices every week night 5:30 - 7:30. It's not time, or fuel efficient to be driving back and forth from home all the time, so Jeffery and I hang out at the baseball field during practice and have some quality time together. We talk about his day, pass the football, play baseball, or just snuggle in the suburban. Sometimes he plays on the playground with the other little brothers and sisters and I get to balance the checkbook or close my eyes.

I've been feeling pretty guilty about our eating habits lately as we've been having to hit the drive thru and deli mart a lot. Haven't had time to grocery shop let alone cook. There's things I need to be doing besides blogging right now but I need this time for me and I've felt out of touch here. I'm actually grateful for the rain this morning so I don't have to spend precious time watering or watch my plants die.

I put an ad in the paper for childcare and fell in love with the very first caller I got. A single school teacher, new to our area, with two older boys of her own. We talked for an hour and by the end of our conversation I was asking her to move in with me! Crazy, I know, but I bonded with her right away. I am just worried that my Childcare Assistance won't be enough income for her to take the job. I could use everyone's best wishes on that one.

Jeffery is struggling with his seasonal allergies. Poor kid. About a week ago he said he couldn't breathe after playing out on the farm so I am now worried about him having asthma. He needs an appointment to renew his Rx. Gotta try and squeeze that in somewhere, hopefully today.

My house - oh my house....Ryan stayed home from YMCA yesterday so his team mate's mom could pick him up and he could hang out with his buddy for the day and then go to practice with them. Well while he was helping me out by washing some dishes, the pull-out kitchen sink faucett broke off in his hand, shooting water all over. The ad says "buy it for life" so I hope that means they will replace it for life. I'll spare you my laundry nightmare.

Well I can get in a power nap before I have to get up and make lunches and get ready for work. So I'm gonna do it, since my head is spinning, my ears are ringing and my eyes are burning.

Be back when I can...


Vacation Over

Posted by barefut , 22 June 2008 · 911 views

Well, back to work tomorrow or actually today as I have to catch up on laundry, grocery shopping, and housecleaning that fell by the wayside while dad, sis and brother-in-law were here.

Wednesday, dad and brother-in-law got the dog kennel fence and gate put up. What a relief, now my vegetable garden is safe from digging paws and the kids' toys safe from chewing teeth. That's right, I said vegetable garden! It's finally planted! Sis and I also planted the pumpkin patch and sweet corn. We had an early BBQ dinner and then we all went to watch Big One's All Star baseball practice. After practice we loaded up Betsy and went to the drive in.

The next morning, we all met at the farm to work on the fence and do some planting. The weather cooperated beautifully - not too hot , not too cold and with sun breaks! The men and sis made good headway on the fence while I made good headway on my tan. I feel kind of useless out there as far as physical laboring goes. So I make it my job to make the laborers comfy by providing water breaks and lawn chairs and blankets for lounging on. I am also the 'gofer' -- I go for the sandwiches at the deli and bring them back for a picnic lunch.

The boys and the dog had fun playing in the tall grass at the end of the field and we all played baseball in the mowed end of the field while a bald eagle soared overhead, hunting chickens at the neighbor's farm (and yes, caught one).

I got to take a long walk alone, just me and my camera. Something I haven't done in well over 10 years. The farm has 11 acres of trails full of wildflowers and wildlife. It was so peaceful and relaxing to be able to enjoy that solitude.

Three blissful days of perfect weather out on the farm - the frontage fence is done and the farm gate in place, as well as an antique potato harvester we found buried in the brush on the back side of the property. It makes great 'yard art' at the entrance to the farm. This fall the barn will be built. I am as excited as if it were my own place. It's starting to feel more and more real that my sister, brother-in-law and dad will soon be living out here close to me and the boys.

It was a wonderful, peaceful, relaxing, vacation. Now back to the laundry.



Posted by barefut , 17 June 2008 · 826 views

I am on vacation (at home) and have had two, count them, TWO days of sun in a row! It must be some kind of record. I got out and got my hands dirty in the garden and it was very therapeutic for me as I have had a couple of setbacks lately. Mom has gone back to Montana. The kids and I miss her. Not only that but now I am stuck without childcare for the summer. Stressful trying to work out what I am going to do.

Another couple of personal disappointments and I am struggling to stay positive. The weather today isn't helping as now it is dark and gloomy and of course cold and wet. I guess I'll try to get some chores done in the house today, that always cheers me up. I need to finish painting my bedroom. It's been 1/2 painted for 6 months. Nice way to spend a vacation huh?

I'm just happy to have the time off work as things haven't been going so well there lately either. Friday I had an ATM nightmare, which is fitting since it was the 13th. And since I had a bad dream about the ATM Thursday night. I dreampt that the machine kept taking and destroying people's cards. I went in to get them and try to make it stop but when I opened the door, more and more cards kept flying in at me, all in little bitty pieces. Friday's real life nightmare wasn't about cards but a nightmare nontheless.

On the positive side, my dad came out from Indiana to visit! He's been at my sister and brother-in-law's, 2 hours away, since Friday and they are all coming over here tonight and staying at a bed and breakfast. Tomorrow, Wednesday, they will come over to my house and we're going to put up the dog kennel fence. Nothing fancy, just wire fencing and a gate. Then we're gong to celebrate Father's Day (a little late) with steaks on the grill. For the rest of their time here we will be working out on sister's (soon to be) farm, planting and putting up fence.

I can't wait to see dad. The boys and I miss him so much. Sis is taking dad house hunting while he is here, as he is also going to move to my town. Within the next few years my boys will have their grandpa and their aunt and uncle living only 15 minutes away. I can't wait. Sometimes it seems like just a dream and that it will never really happen.

My family is so important to me. My parents divorced when I was 20 and after I moved out, we have been separated by 2 1/2 hours in travel time. Then mom moved to Montana and Dad retired and moved back home to Indiana. That left just me and sis out here and I never got to see her much as she is the city mouse and I am the country mouse. I can't wait for that to change! We were both born in rural Indiana. Though sis was only 4 when we moved out here, I guess you can take the girl out of the country but you can't take the country out of the girl.

Well now I have to brag about my oldest being chosen for the All Star baseball team. I am happy to have an extended baseball season even if it means driving to practices every evening for the next week. I SO love watching the boys play and was sad to see the regular season end.

Guess I'd better start my day. Getting pretty stiff sitting here - time to hit the shower.



Posted by barefut , 12 June 2008 · 877 views

Ten years ago
And it seems like yesterday
Where does it all go?

Seems like ten years ago

Like a freight train
Goes rushing by
Yes it does fly

People and places come and go
Only their faces
Do we know?

Another birthday
And we think we're getting old
Or so we're told

Ten years ago
And it seems like yesterday
The way we laughed and played

Makes us sad now
And we wish we knew how
To do it all again


What day IS it?

Posted by barefut , 11 June 2008 · 964 views

I knew I was in trouble for the week when I woke up Tuesday and it felt like it should have been Friday. But, here is where my summer kicks into high gear and I will wake up tomorrow and it will be August. Little one's last day of kindergarten is tomorrow. Big one's last day is Friday.

Today is Wednesday. Just got home from the last baseball game and an exciting one it was! The kids were actually swinging and hitting, and catching - unlike the past few yawners where no one swung the bat and both teams walked all the bases for 5 innings.

It was nice to end the season on a good note even though we lost by one run. A boy who never pitched before amazed us all with strike after strike in the last 2 innings. And a boy who hadn't had a hit all season popped one up into right field - it was caught but no one cared. All the parents came to their feet for this kid's hit. It was beautiful.

Finally home after being away for 12 hours and wanted nothing more than 10 minutes of solitude to put down my things, change into my jammies and check phone messages and emails.

Not gonna happen..... "Mom, look at this.......mom, I need this......mom we have to do that......." "Boys, hit the showers. I'll see and do all your stuff when you get out and jammied up."

2 showers, 6 painted and planted little clay pots with Jade for teachers, secretaries and principal, 2 emptied backpacks full of school work and artwork and 2 snacks later.... 2 boys are snoring softly while dreams of summer fill their heads.

And 1 tired mom struggles to stay awake long enough to finish her blog, tie up some loose ends and get ready for another tomorrow. Only 2 more days until the weekend. I hope tomorrow feels like Thursday.


Mom in the middle of it

Posted by barefut , 11 June 2008 · 867 views

Well okay Barb, I won't be so hard on myself then. I forget that you don't work outside of your home so you do have more time during the day to fufill your blogging responsibilities. I should quit trying to "keep up with the Jonses" as well as comparing myself to others. I've always had a problem with that. I also need to remember to keep managable portions on my plate otherwise my time with the kids suffers.

As far as the boys go, yes they do keep me hopping! I turn to blogging to have some me time. Although they are a hand full, my 10 year old already doesn't want to have much to do with me - too busy with all his friends and adventures. My 6 year old has promised me that he will hold my hand until he is 8. I asked him if I could get that in writing.

It's hard for me to look at photos of when the boys were little. I get carried away back in time and end up missing their little-hood so much. That's why I wish I could time travel and go back and smell their bald little baby heads, squeeze their chubby little legs, rock them in my arms, watch them learn how to walk, hear their tiny little voices always asking questions.......

Time flies. And the older you get, the faster it flies. BUT I have to live in the present so I'll SNAP OUT OF IT! I don't think I'll handle it so well when my boys go off to college. They will most likely go far away, but not too far I hope! And I know, that time will come sooner than I want it to.

Barb, thank you for reminding me that time is precious. My time would be better spent right now, reading my boys to sleep. I can blog later.

Well wouldn't you know it
They were already asleep
A missed oportunity
I feel like a creep.

Next time I'll have
My priorities straight
Using precious time wisely
An admirable trait

Because I had a late dinner
and a soda with caffeine
I'll be up anyway
until eleven-seventeen

So reading to my boys
while it was before nine
should have been my priority
instead of blogging at that time

So now here I am
though tired as can be
I can't yet lie down
or my dinner comes back on me

These days it comes back
while still sitting up
I sure hope I don't
find myself spitting up!

That might have been more
than you wanted to know
So rather than continue
I'll spare you and go!

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