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New Affliction

Posted by barefut , 07 October 2008 · 827 views

My brain turned to mush at work with a balancing nightmare. If you work in banking or with numbers at all, I'm sure at one point or another you've experienced mushbrain. I was relieved to know that there is such a thing and that it was not just me.

One of my very understanding and sympathetic supervisors, bless her sweet soul, told me that mush brain is very real and that if you can remember your name when asked, or even understand the question, then you will recover quite nicely.

I stared at her blankly. Uhhhhh What? My name? Uhhhhhh, my name is.......What is my name??!!!

Symptoms of Mushbrain

Early warning signs
1. A feeling that something isn't quite right
2. Attempts to research the cause of the feeling are foiled time and time again
3. Frustration ensues but must be squashed
4. You are now overwhelmed, the clock is ticking, there is no one to help you

Early stage Mushbrain attack
1. You overcompensate your lack of knowledge with gushing friendliness
2. In an attempt to regroup you only become more disorganized
3. Constant interruptions are slowly eating your brain cells
4. You will take advice from anyone
5. Eyes become glazed

Full blown Mushbrain attack
1. Headache (what doesn't ache?)
2. Loud ringing in the ears
3. Blank stare
4. Inability to answer simple questions
5. Inability to utter a comprehensive word
6. Fight or flight instinct kicks in

Complicating Factors
1. 11:00 am lunch, no afternoon break, it's now 5:30 pm
2. You must find someone to pick up your children at daycare before 6:00pm
3. No one you call is home
4. Four different people are telling you 4 different things to do all at the same time

Although fleeing did cross my mind, I stayed and fought to the bitter end which is a punch line in itself because the answer to the balancing nightmare was sitting on the copy machine the whole time.

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