Jump to content

Do you want up to date information about Scleroderma? Check out our Medical pages at www.sclero.org for all your Scleroderma questions!


Splitting up

  • Please log in to reply
9 replies to this topic

#1 scampie5


    Silver Member

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPip
  • 158 posts

Posted 06 January 2012 - 03:41 PM

Hi everyone,

I am sad to say that my husband and I are splitting up. I am coming to terms with it, as we keep arguing and I cannot deal with this and my illness so need closure.

I am trying to move near to my sister as they all live in the same area and will need their support even though ex hubby will still take me to appointments etc.

I am sad as I will not be able to take my dog with me as I will be renting but maybe the cat. I think I might get a parrot :lol: so if you do not see me on chat for a while you will understand why.

Love and hugs to all of you,


#2 Buttons


    Senior Silver Member

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 609 posts
  • Location:UK

Posted 07 January 2012 - 05:14 AM

Hi Lynn

I am so sorry to hear that you are splitting up from your husband. All I can say is that my thoughts are with you and hope that all works itself out soon for you. Will miss you in chat.


#3 Joelf


    Star Ruby Member

  • ISN Root Admin
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 4,549 posts
  • Location:West Sussex

Posted 07 January 2012 - 06:39 AM

Hi Lynn,

I'm very sorry to hear your news about the split from your husband.

Sometimes having to cope with serious illness can be the straw that breaks the camel's back and like Buttons I shall be thinking of you, missing you in the chatroom and hope that things will eventually improve for you.


Best wishes,

Jo Frowde
ISN Assistant Webmaster
ISN Sclero Forums Manager
ISN News Manager

ISN Hotline Support Specialist
ISN Chat Host
International Scleroderma Network (ISN)

#4 Annie20


    Senior Bronze Member

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 85 posts
  • Location:Suamico, WI., U.S.A.

Posted 07 January 2012 - 02:56 PM

Hi Lynn,

I'm so sorry with your break up. My thoughts will be with you in this difficult time.

You will be missed in chat and let the healing process begin for you. Hugs!

Kind Regards,

Diffuse Systemic Sclerosis, (Scleroderma). Lung, skin and gastrointestinal involvement.

#5 miocean


    Senior Gold Member

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 925 posts
  • Location:NJ

Posted 07 January 2012 - 06:08 PM

Hi Lynn,
I was in a toxic marriage years ago and during the marriage was diagnosed with Euthyroid Graves Disease and Exothalmos Eye Disease, an autoimmune disease (my first, I guess). My right eye had lid retraction and was bulging out of my socket. Although that disease waxes and wanes like scleroderma flares and plateaus, I feel much of it was stress related. (I didn't keep any of my records, didn't know to do that at the time so I don't know very much about it except the diagnosis and treatment). My eye has been fine for many years now.

I had a 105 lb. dog at the time and had to move into an apartment. I found a complex that allowed dogs but mine was WAY over the weight limit. I offered to pay double the pet deposit and be responsible for any damage the dog did, would sign papers to that effect if they wanted me to, and was able to rent with the dog. I currently have a neighbor who has an "emotional support dog". I don't know how it applies to the UK though. I guess what I am saying is don't give up on your dog just because you have to rent.

I know all of this is extremely difficult but if you have decided you are better off without your husband than with him, trust in yourself. Know that you are strong and that things will be better with time. It is good you will still have him in your support system along with your sister.

The best thing I ever did was get out of that relationship. It wasn't healthy for either of us and the fault of both of us. It is sad to have things come to an end but often better things come out of it.

ISN Artist

#6 Amanda Thorpe

Amanda Thorpe

    Platinum Plus Member

  • ISN Senior Support Specialist
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 2,921 posts
  • Location:U.K.

Posted 08 January 2012 - 02:10 PM

Hello Lynn

I am very sorry to hear this but it'a good that your husband is still prepared to take you to appointments. When it comes to financial matters, and at some point it will, you may find the Money Advice Service a government website helpful as it covers seperation and divorce.

Please try to keep in touch with all of us here so that we can continue to support you.

Take care.
Amanda Thorpe
ISN Sclero Forums Senior Support Specialist
ISN Video Presentations Manager
ISN Blogger

(Retired) ISN Sclero Forums Assistant Manager

(Retired) ISN Email Support Specialist
International Scleroderma Network (ISN)

#7 Sweet


    Platinum Member

  • ISN Support Specialists
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 2,890 posts

Posted 08 January 2012 - 02:41 PM

Hi Lynn,

I'm sorry to hear about this. Having gone through it myself, I know how hard it is. Please know you'll be in my thoughts.
Warm and gentle hugs,

ISN Support Specialist
International Scleroderma Network (ISN)

#8 Margaret


    Senior Gold Member

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 998 posts
  • Location:Pennsylvania

Posted 08 January 2012 - 06:24 PM

Hi Lynn ,

I, too, will keep you in my thoughts. Right now, you don't need the stress.
Take good care of yourself and join us when you're settled in.


#9 Snowbird


    Platinum Member

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 1,008 posts
  • Location:Canada

Posted 09 January 2012 - 03:27 PM

Hi Lynn

I'm also sorry to hear your news. Try to take one day at a time so that hopefully you are not hugely overwhelmed. It is such a difficult time and no doubt everything likely seems huge to you right now but that will lessen in time as well. You are in my thoughts too. I hope you get all settled in nicely soon and find a way to have your pets too. We'll look forward to your return with us. Take care.
Sending good wishes your way!

#10 janey


    Platinum Member

  • ISN Support Specialists
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 2,118 posts
  • Location:New Mexico

Posted 10 January 2012 - 08:53 AM

Lynn, I'm so sorry to hear that you and the husband are splitting up. Hopefully you will get the comfort and support you need from your family. I know the next few weeks are going to be quite hard on you, so please be sure to make time to rest and take care of yourself. When you have to stop - then stop! A warm bath, cup of tea with some music, anything to catch your breath and refocus. We'll be thinking of you.
Janey Willis
ISN Support Specialist
(Retired) ISN Assistant Webmaster
(Retired) ISN News Director
(Retired) ISN Technical Writer for Training Manuals
International Scleroderma Network (ISN)