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My Disability Parking Placard


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#1 Clementine

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Posted 14 June 2007 - 12:07 PM

Today I was in the shopping center and I always use my disability placard. I am entitled...I have sever lung disease. I may not look it (although I beg to differ) but I am still disabled in the eyes of the physicians and myself. So, I get back out to my car and some mean person left a post it note on my car saying "disabled? you should be ashamed" I was so upset...keep in mind, I had already been crying all morning because I'm just going through a rough patch right now and that was just icing on the cake. I wanted to find the person that wrote the letter and tell them what a decent citizen I am and that I have an invisible disability. I am sure this person is telling all of her friends about the note she left on my car. Just another day in my life...
Jen

#2 janey

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Posted 14 June 2007 - 01:38 PM

Jen,
You are in a slump right now Darlin'! I wish there was something we could all do to get you out of it. You know you have lots and lots of virtual hugs all around you. I think it's time you did something for yourself that does not remind you of your physical limitations. Maybe it's time to just go sit for a few days beside a running stream with a good book - listen to the wind, the birds. Just get away from it all and enjoy that beautiful state you live in.

I wish I could do more for you. Here's some
((((((((((((((((((((((Big Hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))))0

Janey

#3 Sweet

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Posted 14 June 2007 - 01:39 PM

Jen,

Just wanted to tell you I'm sorry you even need to let this rent space in your brain. Let it go hon, there will always be someone out there that just doesn't understand.

We do!! Love ya
Warm and gentle hugs,

Pamela
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#4 bookworm

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Posted 14 June 2007 - 03:28 PM

Jen, over the years, I've seen several letters to Dear Abby and Ann Landers, voicing the same complaint! Ann and Abby always tried to help set the record straight, and thousands of readers were taught that a handicap doesn't have to be visible. Still, new jerks are born every minute, I suppose. It really doesn't take much imagination, if you ask me, to figure out that there are all sorts of handicaps that don't show! There's asthma, COPD, cancer, and heart disease, just to name a few!

You might feel better if you wrote a letter to the editor of your local paper. I know I would. You may not reach the thoughtless person who left you the mean note, but you may educate some other potential jerks and cause them to be nice!

Meanwhile, I agree that you should try to get it right out of your head! It's not your fault that so many people are not only stupid, but mean spirited as well.



Mary in Texas

#5 nan

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Posted 14 June 2007 - 04:01 PM

Jen,
I am so sorry that happened to you. Many times people stare at me when I park in handicapped parking with my placard. I don't know how they thing I look ok, but they do. I send good vibes your way!!!!!!! :D
Nan

#6 barefut

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Posted 14 June 2007 - 04:37 PM

Jen,

I agree with Bookworm. If it were me, I would write a letter to the opinion forum/editor of your local paper and set the record straight. It would make me feel better and educate a lot of people. Maybe it would make you feel better.

I also agree with Janey. Sounds like you need a break from sclero stuff and the other stuff that has you in the rough patch right now.

Escaping to the serenity of nature does it for me too. Doesn't solve any problems but is a nice break, a breath of fresh air so I can go back and tackle what I need to.

Big hugs to you! You have been so supportive to me! I am here to return the favor whenever you need a shoulder!

Take Care,
Love, Barefut

#7 whirlway

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Posted 14 June 2007 - 04:52 PM

Jen, sorry you had to go through that. I know I get strange looks sometimes too when I use my placard. I loved Sweet's reply, 'I'm sorry you even need to let this rent space in your brain'. :lol:
As for getting over the rough patch, which we all go through, this is one thing my dr and I agreed on that made me feel better. I have to travel around 70 miles one way to see him, and the city he practices in is quite a bit bigger than where I live, which is in the sticks. When I go to the dr, I get to do some 'retail therapy' as long as I promise not to overdo it. He actually tells me sometimes where to go for the bargains. (Can you believe that, Sweet?) Sweet and I go to the same rheumatologist, just to clarify that point. So, the next time you feel low, do some retail therapy, doesn't have to be extravagant, I get a big kick out of going to yardsales to see what kind of treasures I can find, but it is still 'retail therapy'.
Here's to better days ahead, for all of us.
~whirlway


#8 peanut

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Posted 14 June 2007 - 04:52 PM

jenhead don't fret..
Joe says: There’s a lot of ignorant people in the world & you can’t let them get you down.

hugs & more hugs,

peanuthead

You can deprive the body but the soul needs chocolate
my HMO makes me wear a helmet...

#9 WestCoast1

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Posted 14 June 2007 - 05:25 PM

Hi Jen,
Geeeeze, I do forget that there are people out there with such little understanding for others. If they would only dare to live in your shoes for a day....their minds would be changed forever! For now, let it go, they have waisted enough of your precious energy.

HUGS &
*WestCoast*

********

#10 emmie

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Posted 14 June 2007 - 06:11 PM

I'm so sorry, Jen. And when we're in a "down" mode (and we do all go there from time to time) the last thing we need is some goofball that doesn't have a clue to make an assumption. He/she obviously doesn't know doesn't know why one should never assume!

I'm glad you posted about it. I hope that helped you get it off of your chest and out of your head. I hope our replies helped you realize that in the big picture the small minded don't deserve our energy, maybe our pity and a hope that someday they acquire some decency.

Now, take Janey's advice and go chill with a good book and enjoy Nature!

xoxo emmie

#11 jefa

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Posted 14 June 2007 - 09:52 PM

Janey's right - go do something nice for yourself. As for the insensitives, why not get a bumper sticker or make a sign for your dashboard to go next to your placard - maybe something like, MY DISABILITY IS INVISIBLE, YOUR INSENSITIVITY IS NOT. Just kidding about the second part, but there are lots of goodies out there to enlighten folks. Google "Invisible Disability". The Wikipedia entry has several good links in it. Hugs.
Warm wishes,
Jefa

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#12 LisaBulman

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Posted 15 June 2007 - 01:12 AM

Jen,
I am so sorry! The person who left the note is probably upset because they were denied a card! Don't let them upset you. I know it is easier said than done, but they are not worth it. Here is a great big hug to you.......HHHHHHUUUUUUGGGGG!

Feel better,
Lisa
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#13 relicmom1

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Posted 15 June 2007 - 03:10 AM

Oh, how "I resemble that remark!!" I have the permanent license plates with the handicap logo (they are alos the "Parrothead "Jimmy Buffett logo :P ) and I get the same hateful looks, but the important thing is I KNOW what my disability is. But you know what irks me even more???Wen I go out and every handicap spot is full and NONE of the cars have ANY type of placard or plate!! And around here it seems that the law enforcement DO NOT "enforce" the law by ticketing or towing the offending cars. There have been a few times when this has happened that I was having a particularly bad day and I actually went to the customer service desk and complained...did it help?...no, but I felt better!! My son also gets very upset when he sees this because he knows how I struggle and he has even gone so far as to leave notes on those cars when he sees them. I have written into our local paper and I may even write to a local tv station that does a "on your side" segment to help people with problems that they can't get anywhere with.
Hang in there and know that YOU KNOW your disability and it doesn't matter what those idiots think!!
Peace :)
Barbara aka relicmom1

#14 Patty

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Posted 15 June 2007 - 03:46 AM

Hey Girlfriend!! I am so sorry that someone had the nerve to do this to you. I have a card and I use it all the time. I normally can't walk far at all but to the outsider they must think I am just fat and if I lost weight I would not need the card. Little do they know what you and I and the rest of us go through everyday just to get out the door to go to the store let alone getting into the store and shopping! She assumed you were ok bit really if you break down assume into 3 words look at what the first word is. Let it go . When people do things like this to me I try to say "oh well let them pick on me because then they are not picking on someone who can't take it"

(((((((((((Jen Jen )))))))))))

Big Hugs,
Patty
Hugs,
Patty

If Life hands you lemons, make lemonade.

Hashimoto's thyroiditis, Limited scleroderma, Dermatomyositis. Diastolic Dysfunction, dysphagia, Fibro, restless leg. Lupus is a maybe.

#15 Clementine

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Posted 15 June 2007 - 04:03 AM

Thanks everyone. I am trying to let it go. Also, yesterday was one of the few times I have actually looked decent (make up to cover my dots, lip gloss, clean hair, decent clothes) because I had TWO Dr. appointments.

I have read much on invisible disabilities because I have a very dear friend with M.S.

People sometimes just do not get it and for them I am sad.
xo
Jen

#16 ShawMJ

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Posted 17 June 2007 - 05:11 PM

Hi Jen so sorry that happened to you but there are all kinds of people in this world and some just want to make others miserable.I too get so aggravatedwhen trying to find a place to park and there are so many with no placards.My husband does all the driving but he gets upset too.Another thing is the little carts that we use in the superstores that are so BIG! One lady was waiting at the bathroom the other day,saw me coming and asked if I was done with it.I said yes I was but I always bring it to the front and if I feel too bad I go outside with it.My husband was behind me with the full shoping cart and she asked "Why can't I have it now if you're done with it?My husband told her "She's not done with it until we turn it in and thats way over there and she can't walk that distance if you want it then just follow us and you can have it,she gave him a dirty look but followed us.I don't look ill either and I don't want to look that way so I keep my hair,make up etc like I always did.So just don't worry about them they have small minds and if they had to be in our shoes just one time they'd change their tune.I agree with the others you SHOULD write to your paper they don't enforce it where I live either and I wish they would they could sure write lots of tickets! Take care and the best to you.Smile Mary-La.

#17 Donna

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Posted 18 June 2007 - 06:01 AM

I can remember awhile back, weather it was on this site or my Fibro site, that someone used their handicapped plaque and when they got out of their car, some gentleman said to them "WELL, YOU DON'T LOOK HANDICAPPED" & then with quick thinking she replied "WELL, YOU DON'T LOOK STUPID, BUT APPARENTLY YOU ARE"

I get those looks all the time when I have to use mine - but so far no one has said anything to my face - I always attempt to be nice to everyone, but I guess one of these days, depending on my pain level and other things, I could just lose it and say those words, and then I would go into a big explanation - LOL.......

Hang in there, it will probably not be the last you hear from people like this !!

Take Care........Hugs.........Donna B)

#18 relicmom1

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Posted 23 June 2007 - 03:36 AM

DONNA....Ijust gotta say LOVE IT!!!!! That is the perfect response if you're feeling up to responding!Thanks for making me laugh this am!!
Peace :)
Barbara aka relicmom1