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Barbara Lowe's Life with Scleroderma

Entries in this blog

You Are What You Eat

Yikes! What am I doing this mad hormonal twit! I did a stint on the radio for Raynauds, did my bit And then I went and mentioned that it was my desire To be a roving reporter and available for hire I could be the next correspondent or even make TV But now I'm ahead of myself, little adventurous me Oh did I mention I have sclero, but the station didn't care And that makes me feel special to be of some use there   I really worry about children and how they eat then relax I don't think th

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Yikes!

'Oh My Goodness' My first solo radio show, completely unscheduled -- the DJ broke down on the motorway and I was already there! It's true that I'd been training so I wasn't too overwhelmed by it all but none-the -less I was still nervous. The radio news came in and then I had to speak; my first words uttered from my lips and so began 3 hours of music and chat, totally unrehearsed and straight off the top of my head!   I had been sitting in co-presenting for about 1 month. I was no stranger to

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Yesterday's Appointment

As far as appointments go I suppose yesterday was a bit mediocre. I travelled 30 miles there and the same back with a stiff neck, sore back and little patience with congestion at every road exit. No wonder I returned home feeling like I'd wasted a complete day with nothing to show!   The highlight of the day had to be meeting my friend in clinic otherwise I may have fallen asleep with boredom. And coupled with the fact that two people were called at once and fought for the weighing chair had m

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Writer's Cramp from an Impatient Gardener!

It was so beautifully put by Barefut: writers we are! And we owe it all to Carrie, AKA Jefa, for making it possible for us to express our feelings in a blog and not making the whole thing an unreadable sham,which would be the situation in my case.   Not since high school has my English been more called for. It's a long time since I donned my school tie and skipped off merrily through the gates. That wasn't the case -- oh no! in fact I hated school and everything in the classroom, even the teac

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Writer's Constipation!

Nothing much to report but such a drab week with nothing worth the effort of writing. I hate to mention the summer, you'd hardly know that it was! I have deepening sense of hatred for the lovely girl who delivers the weather report each morning, who always forcasts the rain with a sickly smile and a promise of 5 minutes of sunshine. No fun and no surprise then that things are pretty much the same with my gaping hole in the side of my house. How can you build a home in such conditions -- a prett

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Wish It Was Tomorrow!

Yawn! Here goes another week. My daughter will shout from the top of the stairs "Mum have you made my sandwiches?"   Hubby will scurry around for his car keys and then ask me for his clean uniform. The TV is on for no other reason than the morning news, which does not concern me. It plays to itself in the corner. The day looks fine, I'm in my pyjamas, but wait -- not for long, I'm off to the hospital for an appointment with my GI man.   I hate the long drive through endless road works and t

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Winter Woolies

Well, I might have been poetic about global warming but there's nothing poetic about waking up to a hard ground frost such as experienced this morning! I could hardly believe my hubby was scraping the ice off the car windscreen -- but he was!   I immediately put plans into action. My day would be spent searching for all my winter woolies and perhaps adding a few jumpers to my collection. I built the fire right up the chimney, slipped on my favourite heavy jacket and hastily headed for town. My

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Window On The World

Must get a wall for that hole! The whole situation has gone way beyond a joke. It's mid March and I'm still waiting. This never ending house renovation is finally telling on my nerves. An adventure it is not, a pain in the backside is surely is! If I hear one more goose honk at he bottom of my stairs -- I'll shoot the thing! Being close to nature is one thing -- nature being close to us is quite another.   I have little birds fluttering around like I'm living in some kind of aviary. They bui

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Wilderness Years -- In Rhyme!

With head in hands -- How will I cope? No cure to be found -- no hope What will I become, the future is bleak A word I'm not sure of, even to speak   It hit me so hard like a runaway truck It looked like my life had run out of luck I closed my ears not wanting to hear Couldn't even shed a tear!   Would this thing be my demise No information before my eyes A condition so vague, misunderstood And I'd just started motherhood   I went away with heavy heart Not knowing where to start

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Wilderness Years

Y'know, Serena --- The hardest thing coping with a chronic illness is admitting to yourself that you're no longer the person you once were and the uncertainty. The saddest thing is knowing that your family feel the same!   My daughter grew up knowing mum wasn't like other mums. I spent so much time in and out of hospital that in her primary school years she was almost part of a one parent family! For most of her young life she never understood the full impact of the disease and kind of accepte

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Wilderness

How did you feel when you were diagnosed with scleroderma or some other connective tissue disorder?   I've heard this question so many times, on the messageboard and at my monthly support meeting. I guess we all react differently but what is common to us all is the lack of support on offer. How many times has a doctor raised his arms, shrugged his shoulders or shook his head when faced with what seems like a perfectly reasonable question?! How many times have you been faced with " What?" at

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Wild Goose Chase

I would imagine that most people would spend their Saturday mornings either tucked up in bed or doing something more pleasurable than trudging muddy fields with a stroppy teenager and hubby on a mission and a father-in-law with angina, searching for geese! My Saturday began just as that. The neighboring farm paid us an overdue visit to say that the gander had been terrorizing his mother in the kitchen -- I knew which one of the bunch that was -- he loves his piece of bread in the morning! Th

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Wierd Festive Cheer

To say that I've been quite busy over the festive period is probably the understatement of 2006. I'd forgotten how much hard work was involved planning a family get together and a consequent huge dinner to end the day -- I was simply out of practice and unprepared! They base TV programmes on home makeovers and celebrity chefs. I did the best of making a shell of a home a place fit to hold a banquet and I must say no one noticed the hard work, good or bad, and I guess it was all worth it in th

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Who Needs Fingers?

It's Thursday and today is my regular spot on the airwaves. My hubby is quite taken aback by the response I'm getting -- he never realised he had such a famous wife! I find myself being approached in the street by people I've never met before -- "Are you Barbara?" they ask. Even somewhere as grim as a hospital waiting room I'm recognised as a person they know from somewhere! I guess I must have a good face for the radio, as the song goes! Here's a woman who reads out recipes live on air and who

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Whine By The Glass!

Cheers! Barefut. Bottoms up! That whine certainly hit the spot! Oh how I empathise with you, although I no longer have that time of the month -- one less womany thing to worry about eh? I do however, have all the aches and pains of something we still share --Vintage Sclero!   The memory thing too has me wondering about my sanity. Things that I associated with the elderly or the absent mindness that a woman of a certain age falls victim too, are becoming too frequent for even me not to forget!

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Where Is Global Warming?

Global warming what, where and when will it begin? I'm counting on my chickens for when it finally comes in For the very thought of warmness fills me with such glad I haven't been warm since Greece, the best warm I've ever had I was just alright in the sunshine whilst others wilted and hit the shade And I lounged just like a lizard, coz that's how I'm made   At night I wrapped up in clothing before we hit the bars And all the tourists looked at me as if I'd come from Mars For they were

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When Needs Must

Life has handed out some cruel dishes over the past few years, none more so than bad health, if not one thing it's another. I swear I have my own personal parking space at the local hospital and before long I'll have a whole wing named after me!   My Father, who unfortunately suffers with Angina and COPD, collapsed straight after my Mum's funeral and consequently went into hospital. My role as daughter has never been as testing and I'm back visiting yet another parent. My face is so common in

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What's Really Important!

Having a chronic illness means you come to expect very little, least way's thats my opinion. Endless hospital appointments and the total misconception of a disease that no one has ever heard of, except the ones closest to you, it kind of makes you feel unwanted or just plain neglected.   It's no surprise that depression goes hand in hand with scleroderma or other related illnesses. The truth is that we've all had a life before the disease struck, it's not something we were actually born with,

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What A Weekend!

Weekend no longer has the excitement of the end of the working week for me. I no longer work so each day is pretty much the same in fact. The only difference is that I have the whole family home with me throughout the day and each weekend is rather like the last.   Living on a farm is idyllic but also has its drawbacks, like not having close neighbours. With my family's attitudes, not having neighbours is definitely a plus. This weekend was entertaining to say the least!   We lost our chick

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What A Week, What A Day!

Argggh! can you hear me screaming. I wrote this piece once and the whole thing disappeared right in front of my eyes. So here goes again. Boy! I've had a frustrating week. Besides having sclero, running a dangerous farm animal sanctuary and having a blocked tube, I've also had the usual run in's with the medical profession. I have not one but two different hospitals, yes, two, sounds straightforward, Nope! My problems began earlier in the week when my feeding tube just blocked up. I was ru

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What A Week Dec 18

My diary has been so full ---- I hardly know where to begin! We got the carpet down after a marathon 24 hour session. It was pouring with rain outside, freezing cold, windy and fairly miserable. The carpet fitters commented about the mud outside and I stood hands on hips making sure they didn't get past me with muddy boots. Anyhow, after four hours it was all over and what once looked like a house on a building site, now looks like a home..... on a building site! The geese are still reluc

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Wet Wales

A planned trip to Wales was fraught with bad weather and ill tempers to match. Besides all the usual checks around the home before departing, we had the animals to sort out and the farm to secure, all this for just one night! To me it all seemed so not worth it, and I was almost having a nervous breakdown by the time I sat in the car. We set off around lunchtime with enough baggage for a 7 night stay in Greece. My daughter squealed a cry of dissapointment as we drove past the airport on r

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Wet Sunday!

Wet Sunday morning, expectations are low The day will never get going it has no place to go All the plans we made last night suddenly in free fall We'll never finish this old house or that stupid wall   Puddles of dirty water collect in driven rain looks like the sun will never come out again This is good old England I say! as I squeeze my sodden mop When it starts raining here, it doesn't know when to stop!   The skies look grey and heavy, and the outlook isn't good All we need is a

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Wet More Than Once

I wish I could be one of those persons who profess to enjoy rain pattering down and running in blobs down the window. I wish I could share the same energy when Gene Kelley danced so irritatingly perfect in Singing In The Rain! Since I can do neither, I may as well admit that I hate it with a vengeance and I wish it would stop!   I'm uncomfortably damp all over, getting a soaking each time I stick my head out of the door. I have to go out for fuel for the fire but the rain keeps me a prisoner i

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Weird Thoughts!

Men and their playthings! My daft hubby bought a toy which exterminates flies -- true! It's a new fangled thing that electrocutes with one foul swoop! It looks like a tennis raquet but the strings are made of wire. My hubby spent most of the weekend whacking the blighters nearly demolishing all the china and almost hitting himself upon the head at one point. My daughter did the proper job of doing just that when an unsuspecting fly landed upon his bonce whilst he dozed in front of the TV. He lea

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