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About this blog

Barbara Lowe's Life with Scleroderma

Entries in this blog

Moving Home

This old house is getting me down and I'm finding it hard to cope You'd think we'd taken on a bit too much and it's being built on hope! For this old house is ancient and hasn't been touched since then It was home to the English Roundheads, all of Cromwell's men I think they left in a hurry coz they sort of trashed the joint And no one thought to fix it, there wasn't any point   I grew up playing inside that broken house with dreams of being Mum And my friends all thought it was brillian

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Hangin On The Phone

Yikes! My head is in a spin, my nerves can't take no more My patience all but broken, my fingers becoming sore I'm trying to make an appointment and I'm going round the twist For everyone I talk to has gone out for lunch -- I've missed Now I'm a sort of mellow and normally quite polite But I'm finding this poliva a task I need to fight I only want an appointment, I dont care when or who But to make a date with a hospital is a very hard thing to do   The reciever on the telephone is ring

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Gastro Man? Mr Bean Lookalike!

My trip to the hospital was fraught with endless traffic ques and frustrated drivers. I'm sure the wind has something to do with it! It drives everyone to the brink of madness. My school teacher friend once told me that kids go crazy in the school yard when the wind gets up and I think I'm beginning to see her point. Anyhow, I arrived just in time for my appointment with a red face and worried expression and I had a right to be so. I sat in the waiting area, observing people walking by. It's n

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Gastro Man

I'm playing the waiting game at the moment; just 'hangin' around before I go to the hospital for a check up. This time it happens to be my gastro appointment and one which I don't mind admitting to dreading! Why? you may ask. Well, this one is a requested visit as asked for by my rheumatologist. She's concerned that the choking episodes may well cause me to have pneumonia yet again and as I don't want that to happen, then the appointment is rather important. There's the bowel issues too. Oh,

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Little White Lie

I've never been a fan of dishonesty or telling lies, but a little white lie told for the benefit of good, never does anyone any harm in my opinion! Take my little porky for instance, that's what we call little lies in Britain! This story goes back to the days long before the rot set in with sclero. I've mentioned the fact I owned my own business so many times now that the line is becoming tired. Fact is, I have so little going on in my life now that memories of my heyday are all I have for a

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Short Sentiment

We complain when it's hot, complain when it's cold. We're never just right, are we? Complain about summer and wintertime too. We're never just satisfied are we? Just look around and then complain, the world needs putting to right And if you're someone just like me, we have one thing in common,don't we? Scleroderma, Raynauds too and all the trouble this brings, we're not alone trust me!   All these questions and worries, all the pressures and pain, funny things aren't they All the doctor

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If My Fingers Will Allow

Oh no my fingers dead again as I fumbled with a dress Let me help you darlin, the shopkeeper sighed in stress I cannot get the ###### thing off it's lovely but a bit tight And the zip won't move up or down Oh what a fight! What's wrong with your fingers, the assistant grabbed my hands Then began to rub them "They're white, oh, my lands!" Do you have bad circulation or something else my dear I couldn't wait to get away and flee right out of here. In the end the dress came off and with it

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Rain

I get depressed, yes I do, oh! please not again I look out of my window and all I see is rain My life is just a merry go round, there's so much more I'm sure I was always such a busy lass, a confident person,a do-er And now I'm just a nothing, with nothing to do with her time Except write upon the internet making up a silly rhyme   I've got a rare condition so does that make me unique I don't have it tattooed on, don't advertise it so to speak And if you didn't know me personally, well,

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Memories

Spent the entire weekend burning rubbish, my contribution to global warming. It was nice and warm though and it beat the **** out of staying indoors.   The TV's full of seasonal ideas and everywhere you look there's a reminder that 'Silly season' will soon be upon us. Hey, what happened to Autumn? It's just skipped past these days and the trees, well you hardly notice the change anymore. Fact is they don't notice it either! The seasons are upside down just like me!   When I was a kid, pleas

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Guy Fawkes Night

What is global warming? In fact, where is global warming? It's early Nov and already the temperatures have fallen way below zero. Today is Nov 4th and traditionally, as most Brits know, it's Guy Fawkes Night! Actually, Guy Fawkes Night or bonfire night is the 5th but such a celebration would not be fitting for a lazy Sunday. Guy Fawkes was the geezer who tried to blow up the houses of parliament in the 1600s. Had he succeeded it would have been the greatest acheivement at the time. We still h

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December Holidays

December will be upon us and the festivities begin The stores are full of glitter, every one you go in I'm thinking about the turkey, I'll need a whopper this year Coz, I've got the family coming, it's my turn here I remember about the last time, what a disaster it turned out to be Auntie Mary drunk as a lord and knocking over the tree Then there was the pudding my mother took care of that But left it on the stove too long, and in the front room sat The kitchen was full of acrid smoke th

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Stealing Trash

We live in an area which unfortunately suffers with fly tipping. Let me explain what fly tipping is: It's total ignorance and idleness of the general public to place household rubbish in a trash can or take it to a land fill site. The rubbish can contain anything from everyday trash to garden rubbish and even kitchen appliances. The local government here are so tired of this problem that they have placed signs in the area warning of a £20,000 fine if caught dumping trash. Does that stop the p

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The Dentist Appointment

Under any circumstances, good or bad, I hate going to the dentist! I know I'm not alone with this one. Go on, admit it, you hate it too! Well, I have a toothache so what else can I do but see Dr. Lecturous because that's exactly his attitude.   "Been at the chocolate again, have we?" he sneers at me. Ugh clever clogs!   "Actually, no just a lollipop!" I said, afraid to admit the crime.   "Even worse," was his response.   Why is my life revolved around being told how and what I shoul

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Constipation

That pain in my stomach ached for me to go I'd put it off for so long, but I just had to blow I nervously sat on the toilet but nothing to report So this little toilet trip was another to abort I went to my doctor, she sighed and almost broke with a smile But I'll tell you something honey, It hurts when you ain't been for a while How come you're quite happy to prescribe something for any situation But laugh at the prospect of a script for constipation She gave me some bullets and a bottl

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Getting Better!

I did a spot of reminiscing last night, not of the good old day's, no sir not at all, more like the bad day's. I'm referring to just a couple of years ago when my life was so much different then. The summer photographs fell out of the cupboard as I was looking for something else. I sat down with them on my lap and looked through every single one of them. The first packet contained all the pictures from Crete in early July, our first trip of the year. I looked pale, thin and like someone who'

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I Wish It Was Summer!

I heard that the summer is over, on the news today I wish that spring was beginning and summer on it's way No more sitting in the garden or wearing skimpy gear The jumper's out of the cupboard, now the cold weather is here The nights are slowly drawing in and the howling winds blow I might as well just get undressed and go to bed like an Eskimo My hot water bottle round my feet, my socks and a chocolate drink I'll take a good book with me and under the covers I sink.   I hear a noise fr

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Wet Wales

A planned trip to Wales was fraught with bad weather and ill tempers to match. Besides all the usual checks around the home before departing, we had the animals to sort out and the farm to secure, all this for just one night! To me it all seemed so not worth it, and I was almost having a nervous breakdown by the time I sat in the car. We set off around lunchtime with enough baggage for a 7 night stay in Greece. My daughter squealed a cry of dissapointment as we drove past the airport on r

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Watching The Postman!

Another mad weekend. Am I the only person in the world with such a hectic family life? Answers on a postcard please! My parent's have gone on holiday to Wales and my daughter's on holiday from school, are they ever at school these days? Anyway, my hubby's taken my car to work, ****! that's my freedom gone this week. I have three Pygmy goats coming later this week, Boy! that will be fun. Firstly we have nowhere to put them, secondly I don't know how they're getting here, and on Saturday we ha

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Carpet!

Thank goodness for the weekend, the family's all home I'm sick of being stranded every day on my own At least I'll have some company for a day or two And find lots of little jobs that they can help me do I want to choose a carpet, so off to the store in town I had a colour in my mind, the price was knocked right down I wanted a nice rich colour of red to match my warm decor But my daughter wasn't that impressed and found it quite a bore   The salesman tried his level best to sell me his

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Heartburn!

Oh! I shouldn't of eaten that, I knew that from the start This pain that burns inside my chest closest to my heart But this isn't heartburn, it's just a common name It's sometimes called dysphasia but it hurts all the same I need some kind of medicine to put this fire out But I can't find the tablets, there's none of them about   I climb high upon my pillows and gaze up at the moon I'll stay like that for hours, it'll be the morning soon That horrible tasting acid, that nasty bitter tas

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Wilderness

How did you feel when you were diagnosed with scleroderma or some other connective tissue disorder?   I've heard this question so many times, on the messageboard and at my monthly support meeting. I guess we all react differently but what is common to us all is the lack of support on offer. How many times has a doctor raised his arms, shrugged his shoulders or shook his head when faced with what seems like a perfectly reasonable question?! How many times have you been faced with " What?" at

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Calendar Girl!

I feel like a spinning top today. My daughter's at college and caused mayhem this morning when she emptied the entire cupboard to find a plastic shopping bag, y'know the type you get from the supermarket.   Well, she wasn't having any old plastic bag, oh no, it had to be a designer bag with Nike, Goldigger, or Reebok pasted all over it. I keep a small stock of carrier bags for me to use again and they do make great household bags as well. My bit for the environment you see.   Anyway her

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Doctors Waiting Room

If you've ever been in a doctor's waiting room when there's a mini epidemic of colds, read on you'll know what I mean!   I sat in a corner, I always do. I'm not in the crowd of young mums any more with their snotty offspring in arms. I did plenty of that when my daughter was young. I see elderly people with handkerchiefs permanently glued to their noses and the occasional sneeze that makes everyone raise their heads from the boring DIY magazines that doctor's waiting rooms all contain for so

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Lancashire Dialect

Oh me bones are achin, me dry eyes itchin too I'm achin so many places. it's like having flu Me red spots are bloomin, I look like I've got pox I think I'm about ready for that long oak box But, eee I'm not talkin bout that, It'll come soon as think So I'll put on't kettle and make me'sel a drink   Outside it's bloomin rainin, n, fairly cowd as well It's gettin toward winter me bones can alus tell I'll be rubbin on potions and stink like th'owd pole cat And hubby won't come near me, I'

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Arrrgh!

Excuse me one moment whilst I scream and bang my head against the wall, here goes....... Arrrgh -- Ouch! That's better.   Yes, I'm having one of those days, not one of your average scleroderma days but one of those ###### days when nothing goes right.   The day began slowly as usual and then gathered speed at frightning levels. Firstly I got into a who can shout loudest match with a fellow disabled driver. I'm at best the most placid person by my own admission, at worst I'm a grouch when v

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