Here comes summer -- that time of year when your attentions turn to happy days in the sun, cool drinks and light clothing.Along with that, however, comes the dreaded holiday preparations. I don't know about you, but I hate the manic dash for items to squeeze into a suitcase the size of a large drawer and the pile of clothes that grows by the day in the corner near the washing machine. Do they think it will put itself into the wash? One day they may get a shock and realise that I do have a hand in packing a case full of freshly cleaned, crisply ironed clothes. I'm like the proverbial sherpa: "Have you got the passports, have you got the tickets"? The insurance is arranged by none other than me and the whole booking procedure is also arranged by whom? ---- Well me! I'm the free of charge Vacation Planner.
Right now, I have an excited teenager chewing at my ear! "When are we going? Where are we going? How long are we going for?" By the looks of things in her bedroom, it seems like we'll be going for an entire year. The usual cry of "I have no clothes," comes to mind. Then, as if by magic, a pile of shorts, skirts, dresses, tops, shoes and handbags litter the floor like a free-for-all store sale. "Did you say you had no clothes, dear!"
My husband is easy: 3 pairs of shorts, 2 shirts, 3 swimshorts, a pair of flip-flop sandals, a pair of deck shoes, 1 cap and a bandana for his bald patch! I can remember the time he had less, though how that could be possible is beyond belief! What he doesn't realise is the work I do behind the scenes, so what he thinks is a reasonable amount of attire for a vacation, I do not! It's amazing that he goes away on holiday thinking he only has the aforementioned and then every day for 14 day's he has something new on -- work that one out! He never does, but he expects a full change every day. Are all husbands short of a few marbles or is it that he believes in fairies who place new clothes in the drawer each evening? Whatever it is, he can't work it out and I'm left scratching my head too!
As for me, well things have changed -- I worry more about how my stomach tube looks than my own overall appearence these days. Trying to hide an 8 inch length of tube under skimpy clothes is an acheivement, even more so in the pool. Although I look normal and no one would ever know, I spend my time just hiding the fact that I'm not exactly 'normal' and that's the way I like it! My clothes have changed too, and with it I'm a frumpy old bat on holiday with two designer wear freaks. I look like they just brought me along to make up the numbers, but without me they would never be there in the first place! "Come along mother -- keep up."
Still, if it means a trip to Greece I'll endure anything. I'm franticaly searching the internet for a bargain trip to Crete. Vacation looming, better get out my holiday file. Anyone care to join?