I guess in all of my 47 years. I should have learned that there are certain things you can and cannot do! I'm an expert and an exception to the rule when it comes to plain old common sense, and when brains were being handed out -- I was probably behind my hubby -- way behind!
My heart tells me that I'm still the extrovert 18 year old, my head says, "Pull yourself together woman and act your age." But what does a 47 year old woman really act like? Am I condemmed to a life of slippers, knitting, and baking bread? I think not!
Okay! so is building a house considered a task too far? My enthusiasm spurs me on with the thought that the end is in sight. My back moans and creaks like a rusty old wheel, my elbows lock, and my legs feel like I've just run a marathon! Sat slumped in a chair with every move a premeditated request, and the need for assistance to rise, is not an ideal situation when you have other things to do, like make dinner or answer the phone! I could do neither last night and I concluded that overall, the day spent helping my hubby shift sand was something I should not have done!
The alarm rang this morning and two old codgers rolled out of bed -- if this is getting old I don't think I like it! At this rate we'll be building using our walking frames and that is something I always joked would happen! Stiff, tired and feeling like a pile of bricks are stacked upon my head, is how I feel today! Just getting in and out of the car was a feat worth a photograph, and my daughter sat unimpressed as the time ticked on towards school. I got her there eventually but every gear change was a jolt forward it was a very uncomfortable passage through traffic! I think she was quite happy to see the college gate, but I dropped her off somewhat short because I couldn't swivel my neck enough to pull out on the road safely.
Back home after firstly paying my weekly visit to the local market. I could have well done without the hustle and bustle of a parking space and then to have been frowned upon by a gentleman with a stick and a limp, as I climbed gingerly out of my vehicle. My heart raced, my head told me to give him what for! But in the end I just ignored him and walked by him hoping he would challenge my parking in a disabled bay -- he didn't so I was cool -- as my daughter would say!
I hate being scorned for parking in a disabled bay. I have the right to be disabled, I earned it with this condition! I may not have a stick, I may not limp -- yet! and I may look quite well on the outside but I'd change my condition for a limp any day and if that sounds totally arrogant well, I simply don't care! If they can scorn me I can be flippant too!
I'd love to scroll up my shirt and shout, "Look, would you like one of these?" But I wouldn't do that because that's the way I am. I don't want anyone to know what's under my clothes. The the old cliche of 'Never Judge A Book By Its Cover' has to apply to me! I'd never judge anyone for having a disability badge just by the way they look!
Back to the building project. Tonight my hubby will fill the foundations with concrete prior to laying the bricks. The weather has been quite kind but you always suspect the worst is just around the corner. Our weather is so unpredictable and given that last year was a washout, our confidence is running a little low. We almost built a boat rather than a house in 2007 and it would have been quite useful with the amount of rainfall we had. Hopefully this summer will be much drier and I may finally have the house of my dreams -- if I could only shake off this stiffness!