I'm gonna have to be careful with my lingo over the next few weeks. What can a person do when she can no longer eat, drink or make merry? -- swear; that's it that's my only vice!

 

Of course others would disagree but overall I don't think I'm that bad of a person. Okay, my accent may be a bit strange -- certainly strange if you're not from the UK! My "A's" sound much like "H's" No good when you're on the radio live on hair! I actually said this last week -- can you believe? I said "Beat some hair into it" I was referring to making a cake and hair was not on the list of ingredients. I think I need some elocution lessons!

 

The DJ had some problems with my simnel cake.

"Simmer cake" she said.

"No, simnel" I said.

"Simner" she asked again.

"No -- S I M N E L" I spelled back.

"Oh! Simel" she smiled!

"Oh forget it, It's a fruit cake with marzipan" I clarified.

 

It was quite a funny sketch, quite unrehearsed -- there with her posh DJ accent and me with my unpronounceable simnel cake, made good listening if you're from Lancashire, it's the DJ they don't understand!

 

I try and pronounce my English slowly but it sounds worse when you're trying to be someone you're not. And that's where DJ training will come into it. I think I have to develop a rather nasal approach and speak rather quickly with a bit of gobble-de-gook thrown in. Most of the DJ's I currently sit with, chew the microphone and sway on the chair whilst talking -- is this the specified requirement I wonder?

Usually the desk will light up with all manner of bulbs and then the phone goes wild -- how do you concentrate with all this mayhem?

 

One feature I will be introducing is Compost Corner and 80's 90's and Now; Compost Corner being a humourous take on gardening by my personal gardener Bill Tuttle -- fictitious of course! And the 80's 90's and Now run down -- 3 songs from that era back to back.

 

It all kicks off tomorrow when I begin my training. On air from 11 and then back next week co-presenting a show. After that I'm on my own -- oh, my! Then the fun will really start!

 

Do they know what they've let themselves in for?