quiltfairy Posted August 27, 2015 My Mom was put into hospice today. The doctors say there is nothing they can do but keep her comfortable. Her liver and kidneys have failed, Next is her lungs and heart. She is on a no resuscitation code and as a family we are respecting her wishes to not hook her up to machines to extend her life. She is ready to go, as she puts it. Mom has refused dialysis for the past year and at 85 I think she has the right to make that decision for herself and we as a family need to respect that. Respecting that is one of the hardest things we have done as a family but my brother will be here from Arizona in a few days and I think that is what she is waiting for, the family to once again be together. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Joelf Posted August 27, 2015 Hi QuiltfairyI'm very sorry to hear about your mum; it's such a difficult time for you and your family and I can really empathise with you. My mother passed away last October.I understand how difficult it is to respect your mother's wishes and I shall be thinking of you and your family at this sad time.My best wishes to you, Quote Jo Frowde ISN Board Member ISN Secretary of the Board ISN Assistant Webmaster SD World Webmaster ISN Sclero Forums Manager ISN News Manager ISN Hotline Support Specialist International Scleroderma Network (ISN) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
miocean Posted August 27, 2015 Dear Quiltfairy, I am sending thoughts of peace to you and your family at this time. Miocean Quote ISN Artist Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
xxx Posted August 27, 2015 Thinking of you all! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shelley Ensz Posted August 27, 2015 Hi Quiltfairy, I'm very sorry your mom has been put into hospice, and send warm hugs to you and your whole family. I know how very difficult it is to place do not resuscitate orders. The thing is, we have been so very misled by the media, into thinking that resuscitation is some sort of magic cure-all, whereas in reality there is an extremely low success rate in seniors, and usually people are only revived in order to experience much greater suffering, typically on a ventilator for the rest of their days; and in the end, we all lose the battle anyway. So it is a beautiful kindness to not force your mother to endure even more suffering. It is an extremely loving, albeit also extremely difficult, decision to make and to abide by, and to accept. May you and your family draw close and hold tight together, and use all the chances you have to let your mom know how much you love her. Quote Warm Hugs, Shelley Ensz Founder and President International Scleroderma Network (ISN) Hotline and Donations: 1-800-564-7099 The most important thing in the world to know about scleroderma is sclero.org. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
quiltfairy Posted August 27, 2015 I got a call from my brother at 6:30 this morning. My mom passed away peacefully holding on to my dad's hand. She died at 7:11. I made it there at 7:15 but I know she knew I was on my way. I'm so glad she went peacefully and was kept comfortable until the very end. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shelley Ensz Posted August 28, 2015 Hi Quiltfairy, I'm very sorry that your mom has passed away. Please accept my sympathies. Quote Warm Hugs, Shelley Ensz Founder and President International Scleroderma Network (ISN) Hotline and Donations: 1-800-564-7099 The most important thing in the world to know about scleroderma is sclero.org. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Joelf Posted August 28, 2015 Dear Quiltfairy, I'm so sorry to hear that your mum has passed away. My thoughts and sympathies are with you and all your family. Best wishes to you. Quote Jo Frowde ISN Board Member ISN Secretary of the Board ISN Assistant Webmaster SD World Webmaster ISN Sclero Forums Manager ISN News Manager ISN Hotline Support Specialist International Scleroderma Network (ISN) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Amanda Thorpe Posted August 28, 2015 Dear Quiltfairy I have just read your post and have never been more sorry to be so late in replying. Death is always terrible but all those things we hope will make it better your mother had. A family prepared to put the respect of her wishes before their own feelings, a family there and knowing family were busting a gut to be there when she died. It couldn't have been written better. I am sorry but I am also glad that your mother had no suffering inflicted upon her in the name of longevity and had family all around because you have nothing to reproach yourself for. Often people do when someone dies, should have done this, not done that and so forth but you and your family achieved what your mother was hoping you would on her behalf. Can't do more or better than that. Take care. Quote Amanda Thorpe ISN Sclero Forums Senior Support Specialist ISN Video Presentations Manager ISN Blogger (Retired) ISN Sclero Forums Assistant Manager (Retired) ISN Email Support Specialist International Scleroderma Network (ISN) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
miocean Posted August 28, 2015 I hope that wonderful memories will heal you and your family's grief. Thank you for including us as part of "your family" in this passageway of life. miocean Quote ISN Artist Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
quiltfairy Posted August 29, 2015 Thank you everyone for your kind words and thoughts. I will pass them on to my father and brothers. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nancy HG Posted August 10 Quiltfairy, So sorry about losing your mom. Sounds like she put up quite a fight. Losing my mom, although 13 years ago, was the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with, And I've had some really challenging stuff - I hope your loving memories serve to comfort you during this next period of time, Warm thoughts, Nancy HG Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
