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been for my colposcopy today and boy was I embarressed, i asked for a female doctor ...and guess what I got a male :angry: i felt like running out I am 45 and have had 5 kids but that was just awfull,i have put it off 3 times befor I built up the courage to go, i have had 2 abnormal smears the last year, and this is why I had to go,they say it could be related to the systemic sclorosis, any body else been throught this

i feel so anrgy at haveing to go throught this, more tests now as I need to go back in 6 months, i left crying (wot a baby eh...) im trying to come to terms with being poorly all the time its doing my heed in, im up and down all the time but at times feel like is this all worth it, why can't life just be easy, i have always helped others and put everyone befor myself and now I feel resentful becoz im left all alone to cope with it ....sighhhh life goes on I know it but I wonder always wots round the corner,


live life for today and not for tomorrow


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Hi Jaxs, Yes, I've had this before. I ended up having to have a LEEP done right away as I had carcinoma-in-situ. I was put out for that so it was no big deal. I know it isn't pleasant and it always seems like there's something. It is wonderful though that they have this technology today and can save many lives. Mine was 10 years ago and I go for my paps faithfully now and have never had another abnormal one. I sometimes feel overwhelmed too and wish I could just pull my head in my shell when it gets too much.

Hugs, Piper

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Hi Jaxs


Sorry to hear you've had such a bad time...the old saying is that things can only get better...and I wish that for you! Piper is right....unfortunately those awful tests sure can be worth having....don't give a second thought to the male doctor (I always say to myself, well, I don't have anything they haven't seen before anyway, only someone else's might have been nicer :lol: )....the bright side is that you've made it through it and now it's over.

Sending good wishes your way!

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