Sick Humor

[Shelley Ensz]

I know I don't have a corner on stupid things said in doctors offices, but some days I do seem to take the cake.

 

Last week, I was very concerned because one of our family members suddenly had blood in their urine. So I called their doctor's nurse and excitedly said, "There's urine in their blood!"

 

The guarded response of "Oh, really?" followed by a laugh being choked back was my clue that dys-talk-ia had struck again!

[Deb1million]

Oh Shelley, you make me smile!

 

I love the new term of dys-talk-ia!

 

I seem to suffer from this at all the wrong times, too. My words come out in the wrong order, or I make an amalgam of 2 word as if my brain can't decide wich one to use, so makes up a new word.

 

Recently, I couldn't decide whether to say smell or sniff, and the word smiff came out! doh!

[agilitygirl]

Thanks for the laugh. You both are good role models for being able to see the humor in our embarassing life moments.

[Sandy B]

Hi,

 

I seem to suffer from foot in mouth disease too. Totally unrelated to scleroderma, I was recently at my employer's house and he was grumbling about an ongoing problem with his computer. I quite innocently said 'It's enough to make you pull your hair out' and he turned looked at me over his glasses and very dead pan replied, 'Well I would if I had any'. Yes you've guessed, he's bald, oh but would the ground open up and swallow me up!!!

 

Carry on smiling,

 

Sandy B

[enjoytheride]

I was just at the doctor's to have an EKG and they had attached those electrode patches all over. I was trying to remove a blouse when I felt one of them move over quite a bit. I told the technician that I thought I had knocked it loose but as I felt it I realize that the thing was still stuck to the skin but that my -hmm- extra padding had actually moved. So I told her that I was wrong- the pad had not shaken loose, that I had.

She thought that was very funny- she did get the point immediately. :/

[NorthStarHope]

My famous saying of all time, although not said at the doctors office, was "I bess I getter go" instead of saying "I guess I better go."

 

My husband never lets me forget it. Just thought I would share that. I am always one to make up these new words! :rolleyes:

[Patty Arche-Hueck]

Thanks for the laugh! I was born and raised in Cuba, so I would like to say I am fluent in Spanish, and English, and I understand some French, Portuguese, and Hebrew, do not ask me.. my family is from everywhere in the globe, so sometimes my computer meaning head gets messed up especially later after the lupus and the scleroderma, when I have to translate from English to Spanish, something that happens very often here in Miami. I always found myself talking English with the Spanish speaking person and Spanish to the English speaking,. Thank goodness their faces or their laugh makes me stop and fix it.

 

Hugs,

 

Patty

[DawnBreakk]

One of my co-workers was sharing with me that he was going for a Blasting Flood test.. :emoticon-dont-know: I started laughing .. what he was trying to say is that he was going for a Fasting Blood test. We still laugh about it. I told him it sounded like he was going to a protologist at first.

 

Dawn

[Jeannie McClelland]

Laughed my woolly socks off!

[Joelf]

What a scream, Dawn, it's so easy to tie your tongue round your tonsils!!

 

 

I received a letter from my rheumatologist detailing the consultation we had; whoever typed his letter obviously couldn't read his writing as they'd typed "fibreoptic" instead of "fibrotic"! :emoticon-dont-know: Perhaps he meant I was lit up like Blackpool Illuminations!! ;)

[enjoytheride]

Today I visited a PA for help organizing my care. He was asking about my symptoms of which there were many. He then asked me about the rash on my face. I said "what rash!", clamping my hands to the side of my face. Then broke out laughing because the image of Munch's The Scream flashed into my mind- you know the painting where the man has his hands on the side of his head and his mouth open in a scream. I so identified. I came home and still can not see this "rash." Maybe what I really need is new glasses.

[uknlv18]

Not doctor related, but when I first came to England to visit my now husband, he took me to London to see the sites. We had been all over on the subway and what not and got out at the Houses of Parliament and were standing there looking at it. I looked up and saw this HUGE clock and thought to myself "Oh my goodness, that is one BIG clock", then I very seriously turned to Charlie and said "Wow, that is one big clock, isn't there supposed to be some famous clock called Big Ben, where is it at?" He looked at me kind of funny and said "Well, you're looking at it!" I have never lived that one down.

 

Jean

[stillriding]

Hospital related:

First porter turned up at my hospital room with a wheel chair to take me for an X-ray. I looked at him and told him, "no thanks, I'll walk". He looked flabbergasted and actually said " I don't think I can take you if you don't sit in the wheelchair, no one has ever walked before!". I told him to push his own wheelchair and I walked next to him.

 

Second hospital porter:

This time I needed the wheelchair (muscle biopsy OUCH).

Me:- "Wow you must have had a hard time learning your way around the hospital".

Porter:- "It has taken a while but I now NEVER get lost".

After ten minutes of waiting in the reception room I realised he had left me in the wrong department/ wrong floor at 5pm when they're all going home. I was not going to miss my MRI so I asked a complete stranger to wheel me to the correct place. Hmmmm

:emoticons-line-dance:

[Joelf]

Hi Stillriding,

 

Welcome to these forums!

 

Hmm....I can see why you wouldn't be asking a hospital porter the way around the hospital again; perhaps there are lots of other patients still sitting around in the wrong place waiting for their appointments?! ;)

 

Do post again and let us get to know you. :emoticons-group-hug:

[Amanda Thorpe]

Hello Stillriding

 

Welcome to the forums! At the Royal Free I have experienced unpleasant porters and one really great one. I've seen him many times and he's marvellous because he is pleasant, friendly and dignified which means he treats you with dignity.

 

Take care.